Skip to main content

:: I always imagined... ::

Last time I always imagined one day i would be a violinist, sitting on a chair on a stage with a very exquisite red gown, playing the violin with one of my very favourite evergreen song - Love Story by Andy Williams. And then... of course the audience gives me standing ovation for the the brilliant show. It must be great if i really have a chance to play that magical instrument. It has so calm and smooth sound to my ears. Fuhh... it was just a dream, besides who would have guessed a person like me turned out to be someone like that? But i like it... berangan je kerja aku!

I almost taken the violin class back then but time did not allow me to do so. Well i have to vanish the insanity because i think i have many more important things to do. And after i have Zafran and Lydia in my life... then i started to realize something is more necessarily to do other than anything in whole life. But then the imagination about the violinist things still glued in my mind... heyyy nothing is wrong with that, isn't? Nothing can shatter my dreams...

Years passing by..., i thought i have blanketed all the day dreams with my routine activities at home, unfortunately it still stuck in my head but the precentage a bit decreased. When i look at Joshua Bell, Vanessa Mae, fuhh..they are great. And then i always imagined one day i would be sitting in row with them playing the violin (sure lari tempo and disebabkan aku, konsert depa kena baling telur tembelang)

And then, it's not end there, after being successful violinist for years (berangan lagi), i always imagined that one day i would be a writer. I love romantic books so much! I may not be a person who experienced a lot of love chapters in my life but i can guarantee that my words can melt people and they unsconciously weeping only to see the hardcover of my books (we want more story! we want more story!! please don't quit, we want more!!) hahahaha.. see.. the eagerness? I am not trying to gloat on myself... but don't you see it?

Am i having a brain damage here? or something wrong with my nerve? Having a disfunctional brain sometimes it helps lower your blood pressure and calm your mind! (i am laughing like a vampire!) Am i right or am i right..? And my heart whispered; Salah tu, nak tenangkan fikiran pergi baca Al Quran, solat... (obviously i am wrong)

Zafran is sitting on the couch, his gaze darting at my face i guess..but i pretend i don't notice it at all. I think i know what he has on his mind (he must be thinking - my mom is typing some rambles againn... ) I am so good in translation! Well.. i got it son. A bit quandary inside when i see his face like that.. and i started to think (Should i spend half an hour on this square flat screen and let him alone there?) Without chagrin, i continue rambling... (hehehee) Sorry darling, i just couldn't stop my fingers...see they just dancing softly on the to stop it? Helppp...

Where is Lydia by the way? Oohh.. She is tightly sleeping in the cradle (alhamdulillah hehehe).

While typing this, my ear drums g0t strike by million words from the lips of my 'lonely' prince. He asks me so many questions which i don't know what the questions are (zafran with world languages). As usual my answer a lazy drawl (in a lazy drawl when the question reach the max numbers) : Ye ke? O Macam tu yee... brilliant anak mama ni...! Zafran boleh tak simpan semua soalan tu untuk esok pulak? Hehehehe

Ok back to where 'i always imagined'.... Wait a minute... do i hear a song called Killing Me Softly With His Song...? Yes you do. This is one of my favourite song... i wish i can play this song with my invisible violin.

I heard he sang a song

I heard he had a style

And so i came to see him and listen for a while

And there he was a young boy, stranger to my eyes

Strumming my pain with his fingers

Singing my life with his words

Killing me softly with this song, killing me softly with his words

Telling my whole life with his words

Killing me softly with his words....

Okeyy enough rambling for today!


Popular posts from this blog

:: Please Stay With Me, Mr Happiness ::

~Please stay with me Mr Happiness... and don't go!~

When you see something that breaks your heart, what would you do?

When something snatches your happiness, what would you do?

Are you gonna weep on it for years or you gonna find a way to get back the happiness?

CERTAIN THINGS ARE EASIER SAID THAN DONE. I know it... and it is true right until something unpredictable happened in your life, you are speechless. And all the things you have said before, now you find it so hard to do. The truth is we don't know how terrible the thing is, until it snaps on your face. Ouchh.. it is hurt!

"I'll never break your heart, I'll never make you cry"

If only the words could guarantee all the promises made... I am sure there would be no unhappy chapter in someone's life at all. But like rules are meant to be broken, same goes to promises. Well, sometimes all the promises are not meant to be exactly like what it was nailed in agreement. It's all made by human, which by nature…

:: Am I climbing on the bandwagon? ::

I was sitting in my room with frustrated tears wetting on my cheek. First time feeling like a recluse for a moment in my life. I can't believe that happened. And too bad i can't do anything! I just can't. I was stunned, petrified... just like a stupid stubble over there! I am sorry for letting you through everything alone that time, i am so sorry.. so sorry because i was too scared.
Being in idyllic life for years, i thank you ALLAH for that...Amin. And i do hope i will live in this kinda life for another 100 years (masih adakah aku lagi?). I am saying this when i saw something that totally vice versa. Some people is lucky to have such an idyllic days in life, some may be not. When i am happy, i forgot there is someone unhappy. There is someone who suffered for years just to see the loved ones live the life without turmoil. I started to question myself again and again. Was this sacrifice? Can we call this sacrifice? A noble sacrifice might be? Or is this a person with nobl…

:: When something is unforgiven... ::

.... that is wrong. We forgive and forget... this is right, true. But it's difficult thing to do. I have been thru this situation before. 'You're forgiven!' whereas inside, only He knows what is actually you feel. When something bad happens in our life, it hurts you badly and it leaves big scar inside... and things that hurt you, it's like it stuck in your brain 24/7. How could we call it - it's forgiven! Maybe thru your lips, it's forgiven but how about your heart? Does your mouth and heart braces together?

I am not Canon - delighting you always!

Sometimes i have right to feel hurt. I am kinda person who loves to see people around me happy for what i am doing. Delighting people around me everytime when they are with me. But like i said, I am not Canon. I treat people around me the best i could and until i almost forgot something... : Sometimes, no matter how best you treat someone, they will never treat you back the same way. I agree. Regardless you best fri…