This gonna be my 4th Syawal without abah and mak, sedihnya... When syawal comes, i definitely will reminisce all sweet raya moments when i was with them. "Tay cepat mandi, tolong mak hidang biskut raya...kejap lagi abah pergi sembahyang raya, balik karang kawan2 masjid dia mesti nak terus beraya rumah ni. Tak siap hidang karang, abah awak tu bising..." Then i answered "Awal lagi la mak, ha'ah la mak ek, abah tu pagi raya mesti kepoh, bising sekali...tiap-tiap kali pagi raya mesti nak bising-bising, kenapa arr mak? Orang relax arr..." Mak answered with her hand busy stiring the rendang "Dah perangai abah awak memang begitu tiap pagi raya kalau kita lambat hidang, cuba semua dah hidang, tersengih-sengih sampai ke telinga dia" And now, i do miss abah punya bising-bising tu...really miss his smiley face..really miss all of it. Then really miss my mak's instruction early raya morning. Ishh.. my tears streaked my face already...
A must have menu during first raya when i was with them :
1. Nasi Hujan Panas
2. Ayam Masak Merah
3. Rendang Daging
4. Lemang
Type of kuih which my mak always prepared during raya :
1. Kuih gunting
2. Kuih siput
3. Maruku
I try not to drool on it, but it is something impossible to do so. Everytime when i think of it, sure terliur dan sedih. Because i won't be able to get the chance anymore. Air tangan mak lain dengan air tangan aku... lain betul rasa (walaupun sedap aku masak tapi tetap tak sama like my mak) Sempat pulak aku puji diri sendiri dalam sedih2!
Evergreen script by mak when she talked about her kuih - "kuih aku jugak yang korang sedap makan, telan... kuih yang korang beli apa ke nama london almond, love chocolate apa entah...bukannya sedap mana. Kuih aku jugak yang korang telan berbalang-balang"
Mak..apa yang mak cakap tu semuanya betul, now orang rindu gila nak makan kuih2 tradisional mak tu! Kalau buat sendiri tak sama rasa, kalau beli lagi la tak sama rasanya mak... Ya ALLAH Ya Khabir... I miss my mom so much...
Back to abah's story celebrating Syawal, famous quote by him - "Cantik tak tay, baju melayu baru abah? Mesti la cantik...tengok smart je abah pakai" sendiri tanya sendiri jawab ye abah! Terbayang-bayang abah senyum depan cermin dengan baju melayu baru. Ya ALLAH Ya Khabir... I really miss my abah...
And raya without abah and mak, it will never be the same like before. There is always a huge square box of emptiness in my soul and my heart... although i am happy with my family. Hanya ALLAH saja yang tahu. Ok, don't be sad... I don't wanna be sad, but i am sad..because today is my abah's birthday... orang hadiahkan Al Fatihah untuk abah banyak-banyak!
Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri
Minal Aidil Wal Fa Izin
Maaf, Zahir dan Batin semua!
